I have no idea what is wrong with me, but it seems like nothing can make me happy. I feel like I have emotional ups and downs. One minute I am the happiest person in the world, and other times I don't want to talk to anybody - I just want to sleep.
I think its because I have too much going on right now. With the wedding over, it feels like a weight lifted off my shoulders (I can't imagine how Karrie felt). But, now that I am home it is back to reality: school 4 days a week, work 5 days a week, and Josh still has cancer.
On top of all this, a friend of mine - who claims she is my best friend - is pregnant. Her baby shower is in a couple of weeks. She felt the need to announce to me that she invited Duncan's new girlfriend to her shower. This girl has never met my friend, but because Duncan's mom is invited - she thought she should invite the girlfriend too. WRONG! Did she think about my feelings? It might seem like I'm overreacting, but I know this girl will be there. You know how I'm handling this situation? I'm not going! I hope she asks me why - - I can't wait to tell her.
I've learned a lot of things about myself over the last year and a half. I've learned that I am able to stand up for myself when I have to, and stand up for others when they're deserving. I've learned that my brothers wife is my rock. She is an amazing friend who defends me when deserving, criticizes me and applauds me. She has not changed and in my mind - is the perfect person for my brother and a welcome addition to the family. I've learned that if I truly want something, I need to go for it - life is too short to let anything pass you by.
Ok, I feel like I'm rambling now. I feel like I got my thoughts out there.
Hope everyone is doing well. Thank goodness it's FINALLY FRIDAY! :)
~A
Friday, September 21, 2007
What's with me?!?
Posted by Ashley at 7:39 AM
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2 comments:
Maybe just maybe you need to vent to someone more than just a blog... dealing with a friend as close as Josh who has cancer is amazingly hard on a person...I'm not saying you have depression - I'm saying maybe just talking to someone might help. Please keep writing it out - don't hold it in, that's not good!
Hugs -
oh, and the baby shower - I'd go - you are looking very fab lately... have a great time...Duncan's mom will tell him you were there - she'll tell him you looked great...AND - the new girlfriend will be very uncomfortable ... and that would be fun.
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